Recently I had a lot of conversations about the confidence. So, I decided to share my point of view on it.
Confidence topic for me is part of Self Leadership capacity! It’s a big one and it’s not at the same time…
We have this confidence topic as adults (but never as children) because we learned how to censor ourselves, neglect some aspects, accommodate, swallow the truth for the sense of belonging, fitting in society.
At the core of it, I feel confidence (in my observation and experience) consists of 2 elements:
1. Truly including yourself, your needs, your truth, your desires and all of you in the moment (especially your sensitive, vulnerable, innocent parts, parts that hold deep desires and parts which feel threatened). Allowing to go where your body impulses lead you, and taking those leaps into unknown. In other words, really fully showing up! Sometimes being afraid and doing it anyways.
2. And then also knowing inside that you actually will be ok, that you actually will be fine and will survive. You may be stretched, confronted, have some fears, step in unfamiliar territory, be rejected, piss off some people, go through all sort of emotions… but know at the end you will be ok! You know how to hold yourself through all. This part is a huge part of the capacity work which I think doesn’t get much spotlight and credit for the importance it deserves. It’s a lot about your nervous system capacity here.
We often don’t take the first step because we are too much afraid of the second, we just don’t trust we will be fine doing that. And most of people wait till fear goes away, till unworthiness goes away, waiting till confidence comes in. But this way you can wait a long time and pile up even more missed opportunities to include yourself fully!
Self leadership capacity is very important one to step in deeper (and not only as a mental concept) if you really want to go out there in the world and pioneer something you are here to bring! Something your heart was dying to express for a long time.
We are moving in era where individualised business models are on the rise but for that you really know who you are, how your energy works and who you want to be.