‘I’m stuck! I don’t enjoy my career anymore but I’m not sure if I should start something on my own or if I should find another job. I’ve lost my passion for everything.’
This is the most common sentence I hear when people approach me for coaching. And when I dig a little deeper, I hear loss. I hear separation and disconnection from their own truth, people without a compass, trying to find their personal north. For some, it’s like waking up in a foreign country.
‘How did I get here?’
Let me tell you: step by step. And let me show you the way back which you may not expect.
Losing yourself doesn’t happen overnight. It happens when the ‘slave you’ do whatever your body urges you not to. It happens when you make small choices and big decisions according to the ‘not-self’. And it occurs whenever you don’t stand in your truth.
Loosing yourself doesn’t happen overnight. It happens when the ‘slave you’ does whatever your body urges you not to.
Little by little, day by day, you normalize the loss of your unique self until you don’t know who you are anymore and you wake in a foreign land, not knowing how to get home.
The real work doesn’t always lie in the obvious violation of your boundaries, your authenticity or your inner voice. Some people do struggle to enforce their truth in the big things but, for many, the work occurs where most of our daily life resides – in the small choices of life, the routine moments of the day.
Remember, everything you tolerate, you allow, so I would like to invite you to investigate all the small and big boundaries you ignore on a daily basis.
Keep in mind the various boundaries (emotional, mental, physical, spiritual, etc.) and watch for the following in all areas of your life:
- Every small ‘YES’ (while you mean ‘NO’ and when all ‘NOs’ start piling up).
- Every small ‘I HAVE TO’ (while you force yourself to be someone you’re not).
- Every time you swallow self-expression (and you repurpose valuable energy to suppress yourself instead).
- Every self-sabotaging story like ‘it doesn’t matter, it’s not important, it’s not a big deal’ (when it actually is a big deal, you risk betraying yourself).
- Every minute you stay in a place or with people ‘just to be nice’ (while everything inside you screams ‘I just want to leave right now, I can’t breathe anymore!’ This is self-abuse).
Remember, everything you tolerate, you allow, so I would like to invite you to investigate all the small and big boundaries you ignore on a daily basis.
The good news is that you end up stuck through your choices. The better news? You always have a choice. This is your fundamental right, and nobody can take that away from you.
So, what do you choose?
Where is your energy leaking? What are the blockages to your natural innate flow? Where have you allowed the ‘not self’ to make decisions on your behalf?
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